I have had anxiety my whole life. From my earliest school years, I can remember being so sick the night before the first day of school to being physically pulled from the car to go to school. I was still physically sick in junior high and high school, but I also had to map out all my classes so that there was no chance I could be late.
My most recent experiences are of a poorly planned anti-depressant wean that led to partial hospitalization. Some discrimination at work led to a full hospitalization and exacerbated depression, suicidal thoughts and plans, agoraphobia, and panic disorder. It has been over 2 years of different therapies, medication management, self-work, and I am still working daily on recovery. I realize how fortunate I have been to take this time to focus on myself without added stressors. This is why I think I am so open about my experiences. I want others to feel safe and heard when discussing mental health because it is crucial to talk about it. That is how the healing starts (at least that was the case for me). It is not always easy to share my experiences as I still feel a sense of shame and guilt, but each time I talk about it, the shame and guilt get a little less and less.
- Anonymous
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